Oh baby you, you got what I neeeeeeed

I’ve said it once before, but it bears repeating.

I do not date my friends. I just won’t do it. I don’t mean my hardly acquaintance friends, or friends of friends; I mean the guys that I consider to be someone I can confide in, someone I can count on, someone that knows me on a deeper level than the norm. You shouldn’t take it personally, it isn’t any reflection on you as a person. You are not lacking some crucial component that would otherwise make you date worthy to me. It’s just that I keep my friendships and my romantic relationships separate. Really separate, like a masking tape line down the center of a room separate. You stay on that side!

All of your arguments as to why we should be together are invalid.

I know, I know, we get along sooooo well. We like the same things. We are both reasonably good looking and our children would be gorgeous and hilarious and genius….. but no. Just no. Your penis could be dipped in gold and the sun could shine out of your ass and it wouldn't matter. Well, it might matter; But do you see how I am taking this to the extreme to prove a point here? It’s just not gonna happen.  And if you feel the need to keep reminding me that you want more than what I am willing to give, I will probably start distancing myself from you.

I tried it one time; Getting romantically involved with someone I considered to be a friend. A best friend even. It worked out really really well. If by really well you mean that we don’t even make eye contact in public anymore. It definitely makes me feel warm and fuzzy inside. Warm and fuzzy and tempted to vomit.

I’ve found myself in a situation where I feel the need to make feelings clear, again. I don’t really enjoy repeating myself.  But here we go.

*Ahem*

No. The end.