Thursday, August 16, 2012

I'm sorta cute and cuddly when I am not being a mega snatch

Something was made overly clear to me last weekend, on two separate occasions (for emphasis? Thank you, Universe). Most boys only want one thing. We all know what that one thing is.

That is lame because I have lots more to offer than that one thing. For example, I am a really good person to play board games with (I cheat, but I do it discreetly so that you don't know you are being hosed).
 And then I slyly move my Monopoly top hat 2 extra spaces

I can name that tune in about 6 notes or less.

 "It's the Macarena!"

I have a ridiculously amazing collection of music and movies, and if you play your cards right, you MIGHT gain limited access to it.

 Ghostbusters is just the tip of the iceberg, my friends

I am cute and cuddly sometimes (like 6% of the time).

AND the good news is that if all those things weren't enough reason to want to hang out with me, I do an alright job at the one thing (I mean, practice makes perfect and I am always looking to improve, haha!), assuming you survive to the point when I would consider letting that one thing happen.

So the best course of action is NOT to walk up to me, introduce yourself and then proceed to try to take my pants off, as if you are God's gift and I should be so lucky. Ewwwwww. Nice try.

1 comment:

  1. Discouraged Prolapsed UterusAugust 16, 2012 at 1:59 PM

    {sigh} Well there went my first plan of attack... I even bought special material-cutting scissors in case the pants were going to be difficult.

    Maybe...Yeah! I'll design a board game called 'Pants Off Dance Off'! After you land on, or pass a 'pants square', the pants come off! Pants squares are located at the beginning, middle, and end spaces on the board. And all the dances will actually be positions from the Kama Sutra. See what I did there? Now you can say to yourself, "I sure do love this board game!" while enjoying a mouthful of fuzzy warbles. I'd like to see what happens when you cheat at THAT game.