Tuesday, March 22, 2011

Pants on the gound!

I work for a construction company and  I am the only female employee. Well, we have a bookkeeper who comes in for about 6 hours a week, but she doesn't really count. The testosterone level around here is HIGH. I brought a candle to set on my desk awhile back and my boss whined and cried about how he didn't like the fruity scent until I finally got rid of it. He's right, the smell of sweaty, dirty, man-ass coming out of the bathroom is much better than my apple harvest candle.

I am pretty much one of the guys here. By that, I mean that the honeymoon phase of my relationship with these men, when they watched their language, kept their offensive jokes to themselves, and generally pretended to be well mannered gentlemen, lasted approximately 6 weeks. I have been here for 3 years now. A couple weeks ago Jeff (our foreman) said something especially crude (I can't really even remember what it was now), looked at me for a second like he thought he might have offended me, then just shrugged it off and said "Oh, it's just Becky".  Yep, it's just me.  

The dress code for the office is nothing more than jeans and sweaters, but sometimes, just for fun, I like to freak them out and I wear a skirt or dress. They all look at me like I am a space alien. Yes boys, that's right, I am a female! 

I know that fact is often forgotten when things like this happen......

So the other day I was sitting at my desk, working on a spreadsheet or something and having a conversation with my boss. I could see him out of the corner of my eye, but I wasn't really looking directly at him because I was looking at my super important and exciting Excel document.  As I was typing away thinking to myself "Blah blah blah, I love to type, blah blah blah" I noticed what I thought was my boss unbuttoning his pants.  I thought to myself, "no, that can't be. I am sitting RIGHT HERE". So I swiveled my chair around to face him directly and just stared for a moment while he attempted to, I think, tuck his shirt in.  Before I could help it, I kind of shrieked "Are you taking your pants off?!?" He turned bright red and mumbled something about fixing his shirt. I don't think I have ever laughed so hard.  I politely reminded him that pants/shirt adjustments should probably take place in the restroom and not in front of the desk of his only female employee. People might get the wrong idea ;p 

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